At a recent school birthday party as the mums sat around sipping coffee the topic soon turned to when we as mums should have “the talk”. Now we were at a party celebrating a boy who was turning 6, so I think we are safe there for a while, but most of us have older children and these are the ones we are concerned about!
I am pretty open when it comes to my body, I don’t cover up, they see me in the shower (actually they seem to like having lengthy conversations with me with whilst I’m in the shower, hey I’m a mum there is no such thing as privacy!) When it comes to that time of the month I don’t exactly hide my products away in the cupboard. So my girls now that mum has a period every month and I am always positive about it. I try to explain it as simply as possible. I tell them that I make a little egg every month and if I choose not to have baby then the egg has to come out. I tell them it is not like I am actually bleeding, and that it doesn’t hurt. (Well I don’t want to freak them out). I haven’t mentioned mood swings, or why I want to cry for no reason at least one day a month.
I thought I had many years before I had to talk to them about all these womanly issues, (or should I say privileges?) When Aspen was 8 I was with my sister at a book store, I was flipping through the girly stuff books and was literally knocked down with shock when I saw that girls get their periods as young as 8! (Occasionally younger, what?) 8? Really? But Aspen was 8 and she was still so tiny, still my baby girl, surely she couldn’t mature that quickly. I didn’t want my baby having to deal with such grown up bodily functions when she had barely entered primary school.
Had I already missed the boat, should I have already explained all this information to her. OK I decided I had to be a “responsible” parent and buy this book. I needed to prepare my 8 year old for changes that could occur in her body at any time! I brought the most basic book I could find, I wasn’t even going to think about explaining sex yet. No that could wait until she’s at least 25 right? When I got home I explained to her that I had bought a special book that her and I could read together (at that time April was only 5, so I explained that she wasn’t to try and teach April anything). She was so excited as it became our special time.
Luckily 3 years on she is still a little girl as far as her body is concerned, and now it is April who is 8 and I now have to make special time for her! When Adam needs ‘the talk’ can I make daddy do it?
In a year and a half Aspen will be heading into high school and I am sure I am going to get loads more questions. I have tried to always be relaxed and as honest as possible when she talks to me, I want her to know she can come to me about anything. I am lucky so far she is not embarrassed to ask me anything and everything, I am not naive I know she will become embarrassed at some point to speak to me, but I am hoping that is a long way off yet!!!!!
Have you had a talk with your child yet? My advice, talk to your kids before they find out from any one else.
Thanks for joining me, love Mackenzie xx
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