Are you living with regret?
Take a moment and ask yourself these questions. Perhaps jot down the questions and when you have a quiet few minutes write down your thoughts and responses.
Do you have any regrets?
Do you let your regrets hold you back, or do you use them to empower you to change?
Once you are aware of what your regrets are, does this help you see how you can now make different choices in your life now, and going forward?
Regrets are normal, many of us have them. In some ways I don’t regret anything because as I say to anyone who would ask, “if changing the past meant changing where I am now then I wouldn’t change a thing!” Why? Because no matter how much pain and hurt I have been through it has made me stronger, it has empowered me, and I am so happy with my life right now because of the choices I’ve made due to what I have been through.
But if I could still be the person I am today, and where my life is at now, then YES I would absolutely change my past! I went through some horrible things, incredibly painful things that no one deserves to go through. If I could go back and know then that choices I made were going to put me in such danger then of course I would change that.
But that’s the thing, my life would have taken a different course. The things that I regret have shaped me, have made me into an empowered woman. I am proud of myself for the positive changes I have made in order to be safe and to find love and happiness. Life experiences shape us, I know they shaped me. I truly believe that if we allow our pain and hurt to become a positive force rather than a negative force in our lives then what we went through is less of a regret and more a painful memory that we can begin to let go of. What do you think?
If we learn from past mistakes, regrets and hurts, then we have a chance to turn our lives around. Some things that happened to us were out of our control. A lot of what happened to me was out of my control, but not all of it. Still I do not blame myself for what happened to me, I know I don’t need to own someone else’s choices. I didn’t always know that, but after many years of fear, and even self loathing, I figured it out.
Although we are not always in control, the good news is there is so many things we can control. And when we become aware of those things, those choices and experiences that are in our control, we become empowered and we also become more aware of how to avoid future regrets!
Being aware of our control is the first step towards personal empowerment. We have the choice to walk away from toxicity, we have the choice to change our life’s direction if we don’t like where we are headed. We have the power to make ourselves happier!
Some of the biggest regrets people have include.
- not following our dreams of a career, or travel.
- working too hard and missing out on seeing our children grow up.
- not letting go of petty arguments.
- not leaving toxic relationship sooner.
- not allowing ourselves the freedom to be happy.
- not spending enough time with parents or grandparents whilst we had the chance.
- not seeking help earlier with issues or problems.
- not looking after our physical or mental health.
- hanging on to hurt and disappointment.
- not following our passions.
- thinking only more money or power would make us happy.
- putting material items before quality time spent with loved ones.
Do any of these sound familiar?
One thing about about holding on to regret is it can cripple us if we don’t allow ourselves to learn from it and then give ourselves permission to let it go. When we hold onto our mistakes then we feel we don’t deserve happiness, we punish ourselves and no one benefits from that. Not only do we feel lost and down, but others around us feel that way too. If someone hurts me I don’t want them to keep hating themselves for it, I want them to learn from it, work on themselves, improve themselves and be a better person, otherwise they will just hurt someone else.
Yes we make mistakes, but everybody does, learning from them and forgiving ourselves is the only way to move forward and be truly happy. Don’t let your one big regret be that you didn’t allow yourself permission to be happy.
Our past does not have to define us, choose to learn from it, choose to make better decisions now based on what the past has taught you. Our past teaches us, it does not control us.
Forgive yourself for not making better decisions in the past, and start looking after yourself better now! Give yourself permission to seek happiness.
They key to happiness is living an authentic life, finding balance between fun, family, work, rest and health. Having good, healthy relationships, connecting with others, and being kind to yourself. Keep this in mind and start to make some positive changes today.
You truly do deserve to seek happiness!
What are your thoughts on this topic? Can you forgive yourself for past mistakes? Have you?
Do you openly seek happiness, and know that you deserve it?
Love to hear from you, Love Mac