It’s hard to believe that we are half way through the year already, tomorrow is my birthday and another year of my life has gone by. I am not bothered about that, I look at each year as another year I have been so lucky to have amazing people in my life, watch my kiddos grow, (even though I want to shrink them back to tiny tots somedays), another year of meeting new people, carving out new friendships and laughing with old friends.
My unrest lately comes more from feeling I am not in the right place (where I live), last week if you had a chance to read my post, I discussed and asked you if you believe the grass is always greener on the other side? I got some amazing responses that truly allowed me to ponder further these confused feelings of mine. Thank you to everyone who shared advice and thoughts.
I think in many ways the grass does seem greener elsewhere, but the truth is wherever we put down roots on that fresh grass we plant all our former problems in the new soil and the cycle begins again. About 3 years ago we had a lightbulb moment, we were living in a dream home, and in a beautiful location, yet our children’s school was far to get to, all their activities and friends were so far away and it was taking its toll. We knew that moving to where we are now was the right choice. It was, it has been amazing and the children are thriving, so why would I even think about moving away from that? Starting afresh somewhere completely new? It seems insane doesn’t it?
As much as I know how illogical it sounds, I feel like I am not living my truth here. It is a lovely area, but I feel boxed in and stifled. A friend suggested I watch a TED talk about Super Chickens, by Margaret Heffernan. Her point for making me watch it is because I was talking about trying to give my children everything, the best in Private Education and extracurricular activities so they have the best chance for success in the future, but should our focus be on raising Super Chickens? Or raising well rounded, happy, empathetic, chickens who can be successful in their own ways?
If I was to move away and raise them in a simpler life would I be holding them back, or would I be freeing them?
Still with all the advice and thoughts my heart and head remain in turmoil, I am just more at peace with letting that be the case for a while. I need to be still, and breathe and hope that end the end my husband and I make the right choices together as a team, and that I can find some peace in this busy mind of mine.
Somehow my little Chickens will turn out just fine, I know this, and probably more than busy lives or simple lives they just need to know their parents love them and are there for them, and that is the one thing I can do.